Sunday, June 17, 2007

Home Is...Not

Where we love is home - home that our feet may leave, but not our hearts. ~Oliver Wendell Holmes

My home is my castle. My home is my paradise. My home is my solace, the one place in the world that I'm supposed to feel safe, connected and at peace. However yesterday it was not the case. I felt as if I was cast adrift on tumultuous, choppy waters and forced to swim to land. I felt as if I literally and emotionally could kill someone.

I can't really go into it, but I really feel like I invited much more than a desperate family when I said, "Come live with us." I feel like I invited a maelstrom of intrigue, drama, and dealing with petty issues that in the grander scheme of life don't even matter. It was so crazy and overly emotionally charged that I'm surprised the whole place didn't incinerate with all the wild emotions flying around. No matter how kind and nice I've been to you, it turns out that you just don't appreciate it and turn around stabbing me in the back and front. Well...I'm done...totally done.

I only have 22 more years on this earth. I don't need to waste it dealing with your bullshit. Get your life together, grow the fuck up and stop sponging off the generosity and sympathies of kind people, the government and your uterus. Get a job and move on. Your time here is up.


Anonymous said...

Vixen... why would you say you only have 22 years on this earth? i hope you're not predicting an early death... there is so much power in words.
i pray you live a long, healthy life. amen.

Vixen said...

I'm not overly optimistic today. But yeah, I'll prolly live long and prosper, but with my condition, the life span is between 43-48, that's all.

Daydah said...

You have no condition in Jesus name, Amen. The God that has seen you to this level - in everything, shall perfect your health to the point that you shall see your grandchildren on this earth in Jesus name, Amen.
Yes its true o - words are VERY powerful.

RandomlySane said...

clearly i haven't caught up with your blog in a while...glad you put it out there...who know? maybe a certain person will read it and can always hope!